Bad Mother Day

The conversation I had with Jonah whilst wiping his bottom this afternoon sums up the whole day:

Me: "Sorry, I haven't been a very good Mummy today Jonah."
Jonah: "No, but Daddy is."

Today has been 'one of those days'. How do we diagnose a 'bad mother day'? What are the signs and symptoms you would discover if you googled it?

1. Instead of making an adventure and experience of going to Tescos, I openly bribed Jonah to behave himself.

2. When he rolled around the floor in Tescos, I carried him instead of standing my ground and making him walk.

3. Driving home from Tescos, I went the long route so that he would fall asleep in the car, knowing that I would pay for it at bedtime but desperate for a few minutes peace.

4. When we arrived home, having woken him up, I put on a dvd and tried to make out that sitting on the sofa quietly was an exciting activity.

5. Secretly, I had chocolate spread on toast for my lunch whilst he was watching said dvd.

6. Eventually I made him lunch, which I let him eat whilst walking around the house (standards have dropped extremely low at this point).

7. After lunch, I put the dvd back on for him.

8. When he was bored of the dvd, I bribed him with a chocolate bar to play quietly on his own for a while.

9. After we had picked up Toby and Max from school, I turned my music up loudly so as not to hear them fighting and throwing things around at each other.

10. When Max tried to explain to me about an art competition at school, I ummed and ahhed in what I thought were the right places, until he walked away saying "You're not even listening to me".

11. And now? There is screaming and loud banging coming from upstairs and I am sat here on the computer instead of making the arduous journey up the stairs to discover the carnage.

Anyone else have any 'bad mother day' symptoms? I challenge you to have worse ones than mine!