This blog is the opinion of the author and no offence is intended to anyone living differently to me..... but I have to be honest and real..... so here goes....
As a mum who has chosen to stay at home with my children, I go through different phases of being incredibly content to stay at home and watch my boys grow up, knowing that I am blessed to be in such a position and phases of being totally bored and desperate for some sanity and adult normality. As rewarding as it is, being at home with small children is often mind-numbing, repetitive, physically draining and demoralising.
Now, I know all the arguments for it and I know how precious it is, and how special it is to be able to be the main influence in my boy's lives but every now and again I am tempted to look at the green grass on the other side of the fence. That grass, to me, looks so fresh and inviting sometimes. To be able to leave the house in the mornings and not have to look at it all day; to not have to talk to any children about fossils, Curious George or Sarah Jane Adventures all day; to be able to eat my lunch without any food being thrown at me; to be in the car without having to listen to cheesy children's music; to be able to use my brain and my skills for something other than star charts; to have a salary where I can have money to actually buy my boys the things they want without feeling guilty; to be able to go guilt-free clothes shopping; to be a real person called by my real name instead of "mum". All these things seduce me.
Yet I know that I have made this choice, and to go back on it would be to go back on my principles. Feel free to disagree with me, but I think staying at home with small children is the more difficult road to walk and one that requires determination, patience, perseverance, endless energy and sacrificial love. How many other people would work such long, physically draining hours and not get paid for them? Only a mother. Now, I know that some women are not in the position where they have a choice in whether to work and I am not attacking anyone else's lifestyle, choices or necessities. I am simply saying how I am feeling and at this moment in time, I am tempted by the alluring, crisp grass on the other side.
2 comments:
Great post!
Grass is always greener no matter where you stand. I have been full time working mum, part time working mum and full time at home mum... each time I was one of these things the other options seemed more attractive!
I cant decide which one I found harder. Prob part time worker - you cant give 100% to either your job or the family so noone is happy especially the women trying to do it all!
i think you pose a thought that many of us have pondered!! Im a stay at home mum, and believe that it was a good decision for me to stay at home to raise my boys, but every now and then i feel the urge to want to go to the other side as well and struggle with the same thoughts...am i abandoning my principles if i do? I feel a little selfish wanting to go back to do something for me, even a little scared at the big world out there, but it also excites me and makes me wonder if i can teach my boys different things about life if i was a working mum...hmmm still a thought in process. Nice to hear its a common thought we mums go through...i always thought that you should just love every minute of it and the moment i started wondering about this other world, guilt would stop it going any further....keep us up to date on your thoughts with this theme...
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